New Years Resolutions for January

I don't know if many of you remember my New Years resolution post, but I had said I was going to try something new every month. This stems from my anxiety, which gets particularly bad in social situations. If you don't have anxiety, it's pretty hard to explain the way it feels. Mine for me, is completely subdued(for the most part) when I am with or in the company of people I know or am familiar with. For example, if I go to the mall with my husband, I'm okay. I feel at ease. If I go to the mall by myself, it's miserable. I've got to the point where I can handle going places alone. I've had to suck it up and deal with it. But I don't like it still.

When I am alone, it's a constant battle inside of me. It's my brain telling me everyone is looking at you. Everyone is starring at you. They are watching your every move. Don't look awkward. Don't trip. Is there something on my shirt? And my heart is telling me you're okay. Nothing is wrong with you. No one cares about you walking through the mall. No one is thinking about you. You're fine. But the feeling I get in the put of my stomach flying every which way and attempting to shove its sour taste and stinging needles up my throat so I can't breath. It makes me nervous and I shake. The feeling is making me not look people in the eyes. It's making me walk faster, which is making me more clumsy, which is making me even more nervous that everyone is staring and me and ultimately thinking something is wrong with me.

 Whew. Okay, now we all need to sit down and breath. That's what it feels like for me. Not just when I'm alone, but if I'm nervous about something that's coming up in the future. Or if I have to make a big decision. Or if I am uncomfortable. Or if I have to talk in public(oh lord. Public speaking in college. A whole new experience for me!). So, back to the New Years resolution! I made the decision to do something new every month. So here's what I did this month.

 I was waiting to pick up one of my very best friends at the airport in Nashville. While waiting I had to use the restroom and when I was finished I washed my hands(hopefully just like everyone reading, right?). Now, if you've never been to the airport in Nashville, they have the new Dyson hand dryers. They look this this.They're really cool for a super nerd and super eco-freak like me. You don't have to touch anything at all! And they don't use ungodly amounts of paper towels. The only awkward thing is you have to move your hands in an up-and-down motion. Now this is nearly impossible to do without looking silly. I could feel the feeling starting to make its way through my stomach of looking stupid and I was alone. So I took advantage of it and turned that feeling around. While moving my hands around I started to dance. There was probably five other people washing their hands at the time and I was groovin. Complete with the booty shake and everything. I danced until my hands were beyond dry. Then I just packed up and went on my merry way. Afterwords, I thought...January's try something new - COMPLETE!

Goodbye 2012!

With just hours to spare, I had squeaked by and made it to my yearly reading goal. Did I even think when I was younger that I would be spending New Years Eve speed reading books with a glass of wine? No, I did not! However, I can't complain. What's better than spending my time with a pack of wolves? Okay, maybe actually spending time with them and not just in my head. Can you guess what I finished off the year reading?

I had already finished Prince of Wolves and read right through Blood Rite, Just One Drop, and Out of the Dark by Quinn Loftis. I did enjoy this series very much! I felt like it was written more for teens, but I do realize it is YA. And I did truly enjoy the story, even though I still have one more book to read. You can't deny a hot Romanian prince. You can't say no to him! After finishing these three books, it brings me to a grand total of...

25, 243 PAGES READ!

OR 82 BOOKS!

WOW!  I actually made it. It feels so good! Last year I was really bummed I fell just a few hundred pages short of reaching my goal, but I was so incredibly busy, there was just no time to even crunch a last book in. So what will be my goal for next year? Obviously I have the UtopYA 2013 Challenge going on, where I pledged to read thirty books. That's at least 10,000 pages, give or take. And I feel like this year is really going to be a year where I take full advantage of being a reader. So, lets just go big or go home. 

FOR 2013, MY PAGES READ GOAL WILL BE

30,001

Oh yeah, you read that right. I said go big or go home....that's why I threw in the curve ball of the extra page. I like last year that I actually included my pages read goal into my New Years resolutions and I made resolutions that were actually obtainable. I'm pretty notorious for starting something and not following through, so I have some new resolutions for 2013, as well as continuing on the traditions from 2012.

MY 2013 NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS 

1. Don't give up on this blog. I hadn't planned on it, so don't fret here readers. But I need to be held responsible in times that I feel like giving up. So I want to blog at least once a week but aim for twice a week if I can. If you don't see me post for a few days, come holler at me and I'll be here. Don't let me down!

2. Read at least 30,001 pages. 

3. Try something new every month. This should be a fun one, right? Especially since I can share it with you guys. I haven't talked about it yet, but I have pretty bad anxiety, so trying new things doesn't always come easy for me. But that's the beauty of a resolution, right? 

There you have it, folks. I feel very blessed and excited to have only been blogging again for a few days and have already received a wonderful response and great comments. I really do appreciate them. I can't wait to keep up with this new journey in 2013. Hopefully it won't be too much of a crazy ride. But knowing me, you can except at least half that much! See you next, year! 

I'll leave you with this not so fantastic picture of Cupcake. She's been tired of me logging hours on the computer the past few days and pretty much demanded my attention by putting her face on the laptop. She's lucky she's so cute, I tell you.